I guess there’s two choices you can make during a No Spend Challenge, or life in general.  That is to be grateful for all that you already have or to be ungrateful because you want more.

In all honesty, this is a struggle I’m met with every day.  Some days I’m so frustrated with our lack of living space, I forget that I have a roof over my head.  Other days, I’m so frustrated that my husband didn’t put the dishes away when I asked, I forgot he just vacuumed and took Sienna out so I could work.

I am blessed.  I need that reminder all too often.

Since starting the No Spend Challenge this month, I’ve been reminded of just how much I do have in my life.  I’m overrun by material items and my little family constantly reminds me that I’m surrounded by love, fun and hope.  I want to start recognizing my blessings before I start to feel an entitlement to something “better”.  Quite often I find it very hard to feel grateful while I’m dealing with a problem or two.

But as the picture above says, Today I am Grateful!

Can you relate?  What are you grateful for today?  Do you have troubles “counting your blessings”?  How do you help yourself to be more grateful?

Download the cute Grateful poster pictured above from My Fabuless Life.

The third week of the No Spend Challenge has come to an end!

I’ve been having fun this week planning a container garden that I intend on planting.  I’ve been making a list of everything I’d like to grow as well as doing some research to make a mini compost bin.  Fun fun!  Once May is here, I guess I know where I’ll be spending a little bit of money!

Again this week, I’ve been almost too busy to think about spending money on anything other than groceries.  Appointments, work at the golf course, caring for the sweetest baby girl…

As you might have guessed, I receive a ton of emails from stores advertising their newest sale which I have to sift through every day.  I think over the years, I’ve become so immune to seeing  these “good deals”, that they’re just not very tempting anymore.  Sometimes I’ll take a look on the website if there are cute baby clothes involved.  I’m so thankful that I decided to stock up on some summer essentials for Sienna last Fall/Winter when they were on clearance.  I have no excuse to buy anything at the moment, because she doesn’t have any clothing needs!  I actually struggle more with seeing things I want while I’m grocery shopping. ha!

Here’s an update from Jennie

The No Spend withdrawals are beginning to let up!  Not only that, but the results are now becoming more tangible.

Take, for instance, my current Visa bill.  But first, some background info:  My husband and I share a joint credit card for things like gas, groceries, etc.  We try to use it for the majority of our purchases so we can earn as many air miles as possible.  I also have my own personal card, dating back to before I was married; I kept it, ostensibly, for purchases that were going to be a surprise for my husband (anniversary gifts, etc.).  You can see the problem developing here.  In order to prevent the temptation to use it this month without his knowledge, I handed it over to my husband, who is trying to help me overcome my Shopping Problem.  So, going back to my (personal) Visa bill:  with the exception of last week’s eBay earring fiasco (via Paypal), and a March purchase which was delayed in being posted to my account, THERE ARE NO CHARGES THIS MONTH!!  I can’t tell you what a relief this is.  NO CHARGES!!  It seems unreal.

But, again, I have been battling my online shopping addiction.  This morning was almost a complete disaster.  I couldn’t sleep, so finally at 5:30 a.m. I just got out of bed.  There wasn’t much I could do without waking up my husband, so I grabbed my tablet, curled up on the couch, and checked my email.  Lo and behold, there was one from Sanrio.com, letting me know that there was a 50% sale on the Tokidoki Hello Kitty line, with a free gift with purchase thrown in, too.  Now, I don’t normally subscribe to the cutesy Hello Kitty thing, but this was different; there is a Tokidoki ($$) Hello Kitty purse I have been dying to get for my son’s girlfriend, and this sale meant a savings of $67.50.  Mind you, that also meant it COST $67.50, but I couldn’t get over the huge discount.  As you know, my internet is currently restricted, but I clicked on the link anyway.

It worked.

Somehow this website got past the filter and wasn’t blocked.  To make matters worse, I also have my personal Visa card number memorized (yes, this is crazy, but when you’ve done as much online shopping as I have, it happens).  I struggled, I brooded.  I knew I had made the No Spend commitment, but this just seemed meant to be.  And, I reasoned, it wasn’t for me; surely the generous nature of gifts justified the expense?  By this point I had broken out in a sweat.  What to do?!  I should have gone back to bed; I should have waited until my husband was up, and asked him to update my list of restricted sites.  But I didn’t.

I clicked through the checkout.  Now what?

Part of me was happy.  After all, I’d saved roughly 70 bucks.  Cece would be happy.  But I also felt sick.  I had let myself down, and quite frankly, I don’t HAVE $70 just lying around (did I mention the shipping cost another $23?  And the customs/duty fees on top of that?).  It was at this point my husband called me, wondering where I was.  I went upstairs, trying to hide my discouragement.  But it was no use.  Eventually, I came clean, and of course he was just as disappointed in me as I was.

But this is where I recovered.  I swallowed my pride, found Sanrio’s customer service number, and dialed.  I was prepared to beg, despite the embarrassment.  Fortunately, I didn’t have to go that far.  The rep simply asked for the order #, and just like that, it was canceled.  (This is unusual for an online retailer.  Thank you Sanrio!)

There is a point to this long-winded story.  I could feel dejected, like a failure.  But I am choosing to look at it as a victory.  When all is said and done, there are still no more charges on my credit card, and I ended up with a week free of online spending after all.  By the end of today, the success will sink in.  My first week of No Spending is under my belt, and it feels really good.

I have decided to extend the No Spend month.  It’s obvious I need more time.  But, you are right:  I am not depriving myself.  I am learning a new lifestyle; a simpler, happier one.  I am developing an appreciation for what I have, and as for expensive gifts, I know they are not necessary.  It doesn’t take an overpriced purse to let someone know they are loved.

Thank you, Taya, for starting me on the road to simplifying!!  What began as an experiment is developing into a life-changing experience for me.  Best wishes to you and everyone out there who are rejecting commercialism and adopting a more frugal lifestyle.  Each one of you is an inspiration to me!

***

Note:  I’m very ashamed to admit that I have made a mistake.  A mistake in which I very well knew I shouldn’t have been making.  Up until now, I had been using the 31 days of Living Well & Spending Zero series from a great website, Living Well, Spending Less as a basis for our challenge this month.  I thought her series was fantastic so I wanted to “make it my own” by using her posts for our benefit.  Although I did change the posts to suit our needs, they were still very similar.  I was wrong to think I could do that.   Looking back, I should have given Ruth credit from the start and directed you all to use her series as a guideline throughout the month.  I wanted to make a public apology to Ruth and take responsibility for my error.

Although I still have some posts planned for the remainder of the challenge, I would really like to encourage you to take a look at the 31 days of Living Well & Spending Zero series.

You might be wondering, what’s the point of depriving ourselves? Shouldn’t we be able to enjoy the money we earn?

When I did my first No Spend challenge in 2008, I learned to appreciate what I had. The restaurant and take out dinners became a special treat, I found clothes at the back of my closet that I loved, and I used the piles of fabric I already owned to complete sewing projects. I stopped taking things for granted. (And let’s not forget all the money saved from not eating out or making impulse buys!)

Technically, I wasn’t depriving myself since all my basic needs were being met. I had shelter, I had food, and I had clothing. And really, I had so many things in my home I didn’t miss spending my money on expensive, useless stuff! My husband and I found alternatives to the movie theatres and dinner dates.

What I realized after my month of No Spending twin 2008, is that I was able to find Joy and Happiness in making do without and finding creative alternatives to the expensive things. I’m talking about finding joy in the little things again.

I no longer feel like I have to spend tons of money to find the best things in life for me. I find quite a bit more happiness in finding ways to do things that aren’t wasteful, in terms of money, time and other resources. Don’t get me wrong, I feel the freedom today to spend larger amounts of money if I want. Take for example, the trip my husband and I took to Mexico to see his only sister get married. That was important and in no way were we not going to go. Sometimes you just have to to spend money to experience life to the fullest and in turn not disappoint what’s really important in life, family and friends!

How do you view the No Spend Challenge?

If you’d like to see my original No Spend Challenge post, read here!

We’re almost at the halfway point in the No spend Challenge!  How did that happen?

This week flew by for me.  We went out for my birthday dinner over the weekend, and while my meal was free, we had to pay for Jesse’s meal.  We did plan for that “cheat” night as I mentioned in one of my previous posts.  But, you know what?  My wonderful, generous parents footed our bill, which only included Jesse’s meal (since mine was free)!

The rest of my week was spent at quite a few appointments, being a Mom, working at the golf course and maintaining the website.  Although I didn’t get nearly as much cleaning done as I’d hoped, I’m still happy with what I did get done.  One thing I managed to do, is turn a buffet/sideboard/ cabinet thing into my “office”.  Basically it holds all the documents I need for Simply Frugal, our household filing bins, office supplies, an “inbox” for new mail and a “to shred” pile.  Originally, I wanted to use that cabinet for the craft supplies, puzzles and books, Sienna has been accumulating, but Jesse mentioned that it’s the only cabinet we have with a lock.  So I decided that keeping more important things in there was a better idea.

Since I had quite a busy week, I don’t think I ever felt tempted to purchase anything other than a few groceries (fruit, milk, yogurt, eggs).  Scratch that, I thought about justifying the purchase of a cute chair for Sienna with some birthday money.  Don’t worry, I didn’t even go look at it! (other than the picture I saw in a Facebook group I’m a member of.)

That’s it for me this week, maybe I’ll have something more exciting to share next week.

Here’s an update from Jennie:

This week went much better than the first.  I’ve recovered from the shock of my Personal Spending Assessment, and have stepped up to the next level:  being busy without spending money.  It’s been a bit awkward, but I’m learning to be productive as opposed to being entertained.  It sounds oxymoronic, but it’s hard to believe how much there is to do when you’re restricting your spending.  Case in point:  in the time I would normally have spent shopping, I was able to catch up on the laundry, take in an Aquafit class (we have an annual swim pass that we purchased in January), get the house ready for weekend guests, and attend a free seminar on a subject I hugely enjoy.  It took more effort (it’s much easier to try on clothes that it is to wash the floor), but at the end of it, I was surprised how much more I was able to accomplish when I opted out of the Shopping Distraction, and how much better I felt because of it.

Too, I realized that prior to the No Spend Challenge, I have been wasting not just money, but time.  For example, take Wednesday night – Wing Night at a local restaurant.  My husband loves hot wings, and I have been known to have a few.  At 35 cents a wing, I can happily eat my fill for about $4.  It would have been easy to justify.  But add my husband’s appetite, the drinks, the tax, the tip, and suddenly it’s not such a bargain.  So now we had a free evening – what were we to do?  My husband and I both volunteer regularly, usually on the weekends; this week, however, we chose to leave our comfort zone and commit to Wednesday at 6:00 p.m.  How did it go?  We had planned on being out for an hour or so, but we didn’t make our way home until over 2 1/2 hours later, and I went to bed feeling great that I had used my time unselfishly.  So much so, that we are going to set aside Wednesday evenings for volunteering from now on.

Things did not go perfectly, however.  Last week I mentioned online shopping withdrawals; it didn’t let up this week like I had hoped.  It would have been impossible to track down all of the sites where I’ve signed up for emails, so my only option was to unsubscribe as the ads came in.  But no matter what I tried, I couldn’t shake the desire to just look.  The routine is the same.  First, the email.  A sampling of my inbox just this morning includes:  SPRING OVERSTOCK BLOWOUT; DOUBLE YOUR DISCOUNT, DOUBLE YOUR POINTS; LIMITED TIME OFFER – FREE FULL SIZE SHOWER GEL & FREE SHIPPING WITH $35 PURCHASE (a savings of roughly $40 – curse you, L’Occitane!); 30% OFF FOR CUSTOMER APPRECIATION DAY; and the dangerous LANCOME TOP 10 CONTEST (“Vote for your favourite product and you could win a year’s worth of Lancome’s most beloved products!”).  Yes, I fell for it and clicked the link, and had to force myself to close the page when I saw the Free 7 piece Gift with Purchase that was advertised there.  Which is step 2 of the routine:  taking the bait.  I am sad and disappointed to admit that I did stumble once this week, and I fell victim to my online Problem.  My nemesis:  EBAY, and their ‘Watched Item Ending Soon!’ email.  To cut a useless story short, I am $21.03 poorer, and feel like an addict who’s weakly succumbed to their vice.

How, you may ask, could this be, when just last week my husband restricted my internet at my request?!  Here is where the shame of it comes in:  I was sneaky and dishonest.  After debating what to do, I crept into my husband’s den, and used his computer instead.  You see, he trusted me not to circumvent our arrangement, and quite frankly, so did I.  But after 11 days of being eBay free, I lost my head.  All I have to show for my wounded conscience is a pair of earrings that I definitely did not need, and likely won’t even want as much by the time they arrive in the mail a few weeks from now.

So, for the next week, my painful war against online shopping will continue.  But I look forward to another 7 days of learning how to wage the battle, and hopefully next Friday I can say I have done it successfully.  Best wishes to all of the Frugal Soldiers out there!

Here’s an update from Charity:

The end of the first week of the No Spend Challenge is here!  I’ll share my quick update and a couple of updates from three willing participants!

The week went quite well for me. I had to make an unplanned purchase of some gloves and some pants from Value Village because I started back to my job at the golf course this week.  I’ll be working there very part time, basically so I can get some fresh air and dig in the dirt a couple mornings a week.  Other than that, I was home all week.   I found quite a few things I forgot about during my pantry and freezer clean out.  Quite a few frozen bananas!  Normally we go out to eat every Friday (which we won’t be doing this month), but we’re breaking the rules today   It’s my birthday so we’re headed out to a local restaurant so I can take advantage of the free birthday meal!  Other than that, my update is quite boring!  I was busy enough at home to not have too many temptations to spend!

Now, here are some more updates.  I’m so proud of these women!  Way to go!

Here’s an update from Charity:

First of all, I got my partner on board with the money saving agenda. It was easy to convince him as we just found out that we are expecting our second child! We are tracking all the money that we spend. Easy for me because its on diapers and formula and baby things. Sometimes I buy myself a nice wine but I won’t be doing that again for awhile. His vice is lotteries. He has agreed to track his spending on these and to match the amount he spends on them in a piggy bank. He wants to match it every month but I asked him to do it at the end of each week as he will notice his habits earlier on.

I avoided the first of the month grocery sales as I realized I was stocked up on just about everything I needed. I just needed the basic milk, bread, luncheon meat, fruit and veggies. I did go the Extra Foods on the 12% off day deal but they forgot to give me the discount With an infant in tow, it was worth going back and through the lines again. We stuck exactly to the list. Usually we fill a cart or two and load up the freezer and the pantry.

I visited coupon websites and only requested coupons of items we need in the household. This way I won’t be tempted to buy things to try or splurge on.

It was my father’s birthday so I made a cake (not a baker, they tasted good but look like a 3 year old iced it) and took back the recycling so that I could buy steaks to BBQ instead of going out for dinner.

I deleted all sale emails from my email and avoided reading sale posts on Facebook because they make it too tempting to spend. Fort McMurray is somewhat remote when you consider shopping options, so I end up buying a lot of stuff online. Stuff I may or may not need.

I met with friends at my house and theirs instead of coffee shops and doing errands together. I have many friends on mat leave at the same time and sometimes meeting up at Walmart or the mall is just about all there is to do in the winter. We could meet at the gym… could… but, yeah… that’s one challenge to take up another month.

My biggest struggle is the local buy and sell pages on Facebook. I’m home alone most the day with my son. I have been spending too much time shopping for used products for the house and my son. This week I only sold stuff from my home. Clothes that no longer fit me and household clutter that needed to go after baby proofing and decluttering. I did buy some things for my son on the buy and sell page that weren’t necessarily required (extra sleepers – the Costco brand that I can’t order online) but I guess I couldn’t go cold turkey. At least I used the money I got from selling my stuff to buy it.

I’ve been reading books instead of watching tv. I find it much more relaxing and you’re right, I’m not watching all those ads. Since I’ve been reading, I’ve found my dreams are most interesting. Usually I dream about work, cleaning, shopping… now they are more imaginative. Maybe the two go hand in hand… or maybe it’s the pregnancy hormones.

This is probably a bit more long winded then you were looking for. For me, I would consider the week a success. I feel the weight of finances subsiding a bit now that I’m taking control of our spending.

Here’s an update from Jennie:

I am 39, married, and a recent empty-nester. We are a single-income couple. My husband has decided to forgo the pleasure of the No Spend month.  This poses a bit of a challenge, but I have to admit I enjoyed the Starbucks caramel machiatto he brought home for me last weekend  Yes, I realize this is cheating.  I will try to be more conscientious in the following weeks.

This week was actually a bit discouraging.  Not just the no spending part, but the blinding eye opener I’ve received.  I never would have believed it would be so hard to stop spending on non-essentials, and I am frustrated at the realization of how carelessly I’ve been wasting money.  But I’m looking forward to this next week, when hopefully things go a little more smoothly.  I keep thinking of when I quit smoking (yahoo!) – at first it’s really hard not to rationalize my unhealthy choices and just cave in, but after going through the withdrawal part the sailing gets a bit easier.

Now, for the most important lessons I have learned:

1)  When embarking on a project like this, begin as soon as you have decided to do it.  Otherwise, as I found out, you have what amounts to a pre-diet binge:  ’I won’t be able to spend money for a whole month!  I’d better buy things now while I still can.’  In a way, it’s made the month easier: after my week of ‘last chance’ syndrome, I started out with a substantially smaller budget than usual and literally can’t afford any non-essentials until the next payday.  Sigh.

2)  Either delete any emails regarding sales and promotions, or better yet, remove your name from the mailing lists to begin with.  I realize this is scary – ‘What if I miss out on a great deal?!’  AKA the Reitmans email which lured me to there website where, oh no!, there was an additional 50% reduction on top of clearance prices (a cardigan for $7.50?!  a blouse for $2.50?!! groan).  Why did I torture myself?  The lesson, as you have alluded to: you won’t want what you don’t see, so steer clear of advertising.

3)  And a more personal observation: stay off the internet as much as possible.  I don’t care for the mall, but I have a weakness for online shopping; my ebay addiction is becoming problematic.  It sounds a bit over the top, but to deal with this I asked my husband to use the child-safety program we had for our kids, and he has blocked all shopping websites for the time being.  Again, the smoking analogy comes to mind.  If the only thing I manage to accomplish this month is to break free of my online spending, my life will still be a much happier one (not to mention my husband’s).  I’m thinking I may have to extend the No Spend Challenge to accomplish this; we’ll see how the month progresses.

In spite of the painful experience I’ve had over the past 7 days, the week has still been worth it.  Now that I’m getting over the shock of it, I’m feeling more confident about the weeks ahead.  I really appreciate your emails and suggestions (taking stock of the pantry and freezer is a great idea), and I look forward to hearing more from you over the rest of the month.

Here’s an update from Dannielle:

My husband and I live in Northern Ontario and we are habitual spenders. I struggle with this desire to acquire things and can justify just about anything when buying for the home. My husband, on his days off, likes to travel to other towns in the area, just to pass the time. A stop at the mall to grab a few things, a meal at a restaurant, maybe a movie at the theater, refill the car with gas; we’re not spending a lot at each stop but the total cost for each trip adds up.

Two months ago, after being empty-nesters for the last eight years, our son has returned to live with us and brought along his girlfriend. Although they are paying for their expenses, we’ve noticed that we have less money at the end of the month. Go figure!
After reading your post, I talked to my husband about the challenge and he’s in. The kids are less enthused about participating but I will keep encouraging them to give it a try. I am excited about trying it. This is what we need, the kick in the pants to overhaul our spending habits. Thanks for the inspiration.

We’ll hear all about her week, next week!