Why Hard Things Matter

Here we go, another peek into me, the blogger behind Simply Frugal and one of the lessons I’ve been learning. This one is actually a big one in my mind and I hope those of you reading it will find some encouragement today 🙂

**Sensitive subject at hand so turn away now if you are sensitive to pregnancy loss.

This is part of my story and I’m so happy that I can be in a place to share it.  Today, October 15, is Pregnancy & Infant Loss Day. As some of you know, from past posts I’ve written, I’ve experience three losses in my lifetime.  They were essentially unexplained (aside from the obvious reason that the babies weren’t forming correctly) because I don’t have any known health issues. Those losses were absolutely devastating to me.  They made me question whether or not I’d ever be a Mom or carry a healthy baby to term. Even after the birth of my daughter, in 2012, I experienced another loss which made me wonder if I’d forever be the parent to one living child.  The hardest part in all of it was the loss of my hopes and dreams for each child that I was carrying, even for a short while. As soon as I knew I was pregnant I’d start imagining my life with that new child in it, what we’d be doing on such and such a day, and so on.  That was hard.

But, the heart of me sharing that is actually the lesson I have learned from my experience.  Today, I can say that I am thankful for what happened to me. Yes, thankful!

I have gained so much compassion for those that have experienced pregnancy and infant losses. I’ve been there. I know the words they want to hear. I know when it’s best to be quiet. I know they might just need a bouquet of flowers so they know that I’m thinking of them and their child. Their child mattered.  I am so thankful that I can be that person because of what I have experienced. I don’t like that it happens to others, but I’m glad that my hardship can benefit others.

Now, that is the hand that I’ve been dealt.  You most likely have been dealt a different set of hard things in your life.  But I’m now a firm believer that hard things matter to our lives and the lives of others.  Hard things build compassion, can create a less judgmental person and ultimately help us grow a larger circle of inclusiveness.

To the person that has walked through a divorce, you matter to someone that is just starting to walk through it now. To the person that has lost someone to cancer, you matter to the woman who was just diagnosed with breast cancer. No matter what hard situations you have been through, you can help others with your knowledge.

So that, in a nutshell is the biggest lesson that I have learned in the past 5 or so years. Hard things DO matter.

I’d love to encourage you to look at your hard things and try to see the blessings that they are to others. No matter what, you have something to offer. At the very least with my words, I hope your heart feels lighter!